Butterfly vs. Moth

As much as I claim to be an introvert,
I can't help but sometime feels invisible.
Don't get me wrong.
I still appreciate of alone time and/or being alone.

But sometimes I just can't help but feel...invisible.


Just like what happened today.


Most days I would appreciate it.
But today, it just got me thinking hard.
Because all throughout what had happened,
Along the way I just noticed/felt like most attention were only to one person.

Most days I would appreciate it.
But today, I felt...neglected.
Which was ridiculous because I don't even know those people.

And what's even sad is at one time
I felt the sudden urge to make them to notice me.
I was even slightly angry at them.
Like "Uhh HELLO? I'M HERE TOO. LOOK AT ME!"

Sigh.
Unbelievable.

But then right after that,
A sudden realisation hit me.
What am i doing?
I do not need this.
I do not need this person to see me to receive information.
This is not important.
This person is not important.

I calm myself right after and
Slowly told myself you are far better than this petty feeling.

So I ditched it.
And then I walked the whole thing through breezily.

I was there.
Even if hidden behind invisible wall.
I was there.
Even if the others didn't seemed to see me.

I know I was there.

I chuckled to myself over this.
Like I know why this happened.
Why they were giving more attention to one than the other (me).

Because it's the way that person presents themselves.
How they carry themselves.
You may not understand how they do it.
But that effortlessness comes naturally to them.

Just like how people would react to butterfly.
As oppose to moth.
Far better than the other.
Naturally.

But then a thought hit me.
From all of this,
All I ever wanted was just to be acknowledged. 
No matter who or what I am.
No matter how introverted I claim to be.
Being acknowledged is nice shit, yknow.
It gives you that sense of fulfillment.

Which is also why it's fucking sucks.